The 80s. A decade of big hair, neon, and synthesizers. It was a golden age for music, with iconic artists and unforgettable tracks. But let’s be honest, not every song that topped the charts was a masterpiece.
Some tunes, though catchy in their own way, maybe haven’t aged as gracefully as others. We all have those earworms we secretly (or not so secretly) love to hate. This list dives into 10 such songs – some you might guiltily admit to jamming out to back in the day, but that might raise an eyebrow or two upon revisiting.
We’ve compiled them based on Rolling Stone magazine’s Readers’ Poll in 2011, so get ready for a dose of nostalgia (and maybe a cringe or two).
10. Rick Astley – “Never Gonna Give You Up”
Remember that inescapable melody that seemed to follow you everywhere in the late 80s? You know the one – it wasn’t uncommon to hear it at the grocery store, the mall, and even your dentist’s office. Fast forward 20 years, and the internet unleashed a cruel (yet strangely amusing) meme built around that very song.
While the “rickroll” might be a relic of the past, the backlash against the song itself is very real. Turns out, the world can only handle so much of a good thing, even when it’s delivered with a healthy dose of irony. And, no, this is not an elaborate attempt to rickroll you (though it’s tempting).
9. Taco – “Puttin’ On The Ritz”
Infectious melody? Check. Irresistible dance beat? Check. A healthy dose of 80s cheese? Absolutely. Taco’s version of “Puttin’ on the Ritz” might raise an eyebrow (or two) for some, but here’s the thing: the original is a certified classic by Irving Berlin, with legendary covers by artists like Ella Fitzgerald and Fred Astaire.
Taco simply injected a shot of quirky synth-pop into the mix. Love it or hate it, Taco’s rendition proves that a catchy melody can transcend time, even when delivered in an unexpected package.
8. Toni Basil – “Mickey”
There’s a special kind of torture reserved for undeniably catchy, yet slightly irritating songs. Toni Basil’s “Mickey” might just be the ringleader of this particular circus. But before we dismiss it as a mere earworm, let’s consider Basil’s pedigree. She wasn’t just a singer; she was a respected choreographer, having worked with music royalty like David Bowie and Tina Turner.
In 1982, she took a song called “Kitty” by a British band and transformed it into the cheerleader-themed “Mickey”, adding the now-infamous “Oh Mickey, you’re so fine” chant. With a shoestring-budget video perfectly capturing that energy and an MTV in its early days playing it on repeat, “Mickey” became inescapable.
7. Bobby McFerrin – “Don’t Worry Be Happy”
This list seems to be targeting the one-hit wonders of the 80s, and Bobby McFerrin’s “Don’t Worry Be Happy” might be a prime suspect. Interestingly, even McFerrin himself isn’t the song’s biggest fan – he is reportedly tired of it and hasn’t performed it in years.
But here’s what makes this track unique: inspired by the teachings of Indian mystic Meher Baba, it’s entirely a cappella, a feat that’s never been replicated at the top of the Billboard Hot 100. Love it or loathe it, “Don’t Worry Be Happy” stands out as a quirky, vocally-driven anomaly in pop music history.
6. Falco – “Rock Me Amadeus”
For some, the 80s were a decade of synthesizer bliss and catchy one-liners. And one such earworm is Falco’s “Rock Me Amadeus”. While the German lyrics and dated production might raise eyebrows today, the song’s significance is undeniable. In 1986, it shattered barriers, becoming the first German-language song to top the U.S. charts.
Falco tragically passed away in 1998, but “Rock Me Amadeus” continues to resonate. From topping charts to inspiring a now-legendary Simpsons parody, the song’s legacy lives on as a reminder of music’s ability to bridge cultures and generations.
5. Men Without Hats – “The Safety Dance”
Some 80s hits haven’t aged like a fine wine. Men Without Hats’ “The Safety Dance” might fall into that category. Sure, the opening riff is pure earworm magic, guaranteed to put a smile on your face. But then there’s the video – a gloriously nonsensical explosion of 80s cheese. Renaissance fair garb, questionable dance moves…it’s bizarre, but undeniably memorable.
One-hit wonder status aside (“Pop Goes The World” notwithstanding), “The Safety Dance” keeps finding new life. Movies, commercials, you name it – the song keeps the royalties rolling in. They even toured with Human League in 2011! One can only imagine the struggle of crafting a setlist without their biggest hits. Maybe that’s a story for another day.
4. Wham! – “Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go)”
The 80s music scene was a kaleidoscope of sound, from heart-wrenching power ballads to infectious dance tracks. But not every chart-topper was a masterpiece. Wham!’s “Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go)” is a case in point. Sure, it might not be their strongest effort (“Everything She Wants” anyone?), but worst song of the 80s? That’s a bold claim.
The song itself is a catchy slice of synth-pop escapism, but the video takes the cake. Remember those ubiquitous “Choose Life” shirts? Turns out, it wasn’t a pro-life statement as many thought, but rather an anti-war message. “Wake Me Up” became a global hit, but the band itself was short-lived.
3. Chris de Burgh – “Lady In Red”
Pure cheese or heartfelt ballad? Chris de Burgh’s “Lady in Red” walks the line. This synth-heavy love song launched de Burgh’s career (think Paul Carrack on steroids). The inspiration is sweet – he wrote it about seeing his wife in red, mistaking her for someone else!
Interestingly, a Gene Wilder movie, The Woman in Red, came out just two years before. Both the song and movie were big hits, but faded from the spotlight. And like de Burgh, Wilder retreated from public life. Their legacies live on – a reminder of the delightfully dramatic (and sometimes funny) 80s.
2. Europe – “The Final Countdown”
The 80s music scene wasn’t shy about bombast – soaring vocals, pulsating synthesizers, and larger-than-life music videos. But some songs embraced that excess a little too wholeheartedly, just like Europe’s “The Final Countdown”.
This keyboard-driven anthem might be undeniably catchy, but in an “irritation stuck in your head” kind of way. The song recently enjoyed a resurgence thanks to its use on Arrested Development (thanks Gob!), but does that make it a classic? The jury’s still out. Europe themselves reunited in 2003 and continue to tour, perhaps hoping to share the stage with ASIA, Boston, and Chicago someday – a concert guaranteed to confuse even the most die-hard 80s fan.
1. Starship – “We Built This City”
The results are in, and the internet has spoken! Starship’s “We Built This City” has been crowned the absolute worst song of the 80s in Rolling Stone’s 2011 reader poll. This isn’t the first time this synth-heavy anthem has achieved such dubious notoriety – in 2004, Blender magazine awarded it the title of “Most Awesomely Bad Song of All Time”.
So what exactly makes this song such a lightning rod for strong opinions? Well, for starters, it represents a sharp turn for the band formerly known as Jefferson Airplane. The iconic 60s rock outfit morphed into the sleekly produced Starship in the 80s, a change that left many fans feeling alienated.
Throw in the synthesizer-drenched melody and lyrics that some consider nonsensical, and “We Built This City” becomes a prime example of the sometimes jarring musical shifts of the era. Love it or hate it, the song’s undeniable earworm quality and place in pop culture history are undeniable.